iPod, uPod, airPod

Attention LAXers, BURbankinos, ONTarioids, John Wayne SNAholes and LGBeachettes… !!

Six airlines announced yesterday that they will be adding iPod connections to their fleet of big Tylenols. For those flying the friendly skies on United, Continental, Delta, Emirates, KLM and Air France you will soon have the power to run and charge your iPod while in flight, as well as watch videos on the seat-back display of the fidgety, sweaty guy in front of you.

And ooh, ouch Microsoft. This announcement came practically in unison with the launch of their much ballyhooed “iPod killer” Zune. Current estimates show Apple as the proud seller of nearly 70 million iPods, and more than 1.5 billion songs through iTunes. In addition, 70+ percent of all new autos sold in the United States this year are expected to have iPod integration.

Naysayer-doomsdayer analysts have “voiced concern that there is limited room for growth in the iPod's market share because it already has more than 75% of the U.S. market for digital music players.” Sounds like someone’s not thinking outside the pod.

Let’s reminisce about what Apple has done so far… They made an iPod with a scroll wheel and a few gigs. Then one with a touch wheel and way more gigs. Then pictures. Then minis. Then nanos. Then smaller nanos. Then video. Then shuffles. Then bigger video. Then smaller shuffles. You get the point.

They will keep making better what you already like, and/or create something new that you’ll love even more. And now, their shiny little devices can jive with your car and your airplanes. Soon, all you’ll have to do is think about what song you want to hear, and it will play in your head. To recharge, just take a nap. And payment? Direct payment from brainwaves to bank account. Nothing short of complete and total assimilation will suffice.

Resistance is futile.